This is what a feminist looks like.

How Movies Made For Girls Devalue Boys

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This is what a feminist looks like.

This is what a feminist looks like.

A couple of nights ago I went to see Disney’s Maleficent with my girl. This is one of very few movies aimed at women that I wanted to see. I knew that I probably wouldn’t like the story, but that I likely would like looking at Angelina Jolie, as well as the pretty awesome visual effects.

And of course I didn’t like the story. But it was for a reason that I didn’t expect and admittedly should have.

I’ve criticized fairy tales for a long, long time. I’ve always thought that they communicated unrealistic things to little girls–that message being if girls waited patiently enough, their Prince Charming would one day come to rescue them.

Fairy tales are powerful, and that message speaks to the very core of femininity: the need to feel safe and secure. Hence that message has lived on for hundreds, if not thousands of years.

I am also the father of a six-year-old girl, and we’ve watched lots of children’s movies together. While I’ve been prepared to tell her that Prince Charming is as real as Mickey Mouse, the current trend of movies is going to have me eventually persuading her that Prince Charming is even necessary. We’ve gone from “every woman will find their prince” to “women don’t need princes” very, very quickly.

For the uninitiated, “Maleficent” tells the story of “Sleeping Beauty” from the villain’s point of view. Taking a cue from the wildly successful Broadway hit, “Wicked,” the audience discovers that they were never told the *real* story.

While Wicked’s plot is all over the place (we are supposed to like the villian because she gets made fun of because she’s green and there’s a plot by the Wizard of Oz to remove animal’s voices that is never resolved [or even explained] but is supposed to make us feel a Greenpeace like sympathy for the Wicked Witch of the West), Maleficent’s story is fairly tight. Maleficent was wronged by her true love, a man who wanted to become king, when he drugged her and clipped her wings to become king. Maleficent gets her revenge by cursing the king’s daughter (Sleeping Beauty) to fall into a deep sleep on her 16th birthday. The king sends his daughter away to be raised by fairies while Maleficent basically oversees Sleeping Beauty’s rearing.

The moment that Aurora falls into her slumber due to the curse Maleficent put upon her, a curse that can only be broken by true love’s kiss, I turned to my girl and rightfully predicted whose kiss would awaken Sleeping Beauty. And I’ll give you a hint: the kisser doesn’t have a penis.

How did I predict this? Because I saw a similar movie late last year, Disney’s “Frozen”. Frozen had a similar trope, and when you start to dissect that film’s themes and compare to Maleficent, there’s a consistent message.

In both Maleficent and Frozen, men are not only secondary characters, but the majority of them are not trustworthy and are either evil or insane. Men are ambitious and want power no matter what the cost or who they hurt. Girls, on the other hand, can do anything they want without the need of men.

In Maleficent, it’s men who are evil and paranoid, uncaring about their daughters and wives. Women, be it fairies or otherwise, are innocent, nurturing creatures wronged by or trapped by men at every turn. There is a man who is at Maleficent’s side who is portrayed favorably, but that man was actually a crow that Maleficent turned into a man. He certainly was not born that way.

One of the first movies I ever watched with my daughter was “Tinkerbell and The Lost Treasure.” In this movie, Tinkerbell is tasked to build a scepter with a sacred moonstone, her friend/boyfriend Terrence helps her (but won’t break rules for her), she becomes annoyed with him, and due to her quick temper she breaks the moonstone and yells at Terrence. Tinkerbell then learns of a legend where she can be granted a wish if she finds a treasure far away. She sets off to find the treasure so she can wish the moonstone unbroken.

Tinkerbell is a CUNT the entire movie. I am not exaggerating here. She finally gets to near where the treasure is but doesn’t get a wish, and she breaks down and realizes that she’s been mean to everyone who has helped her along the way. At that moment, Terrence shows up to save the day, and they go back to Pixie Hollow and Terrence’s math skills make the shattered moonstone burn brightly and Tinkerbell is a hero. (My apologies for not beginning this paragraph with a spoiler alert.)

There is no lesson to be learned by this story other than, “No matter how much of a bitch you are, your beta male friends will always be there for you exactly when you need them.” There’s also a message about taking the shortcuts instead of owning up to your mistakes, which is also not an ideal to that I’d like to teach my daughter.

There are movies geared towards girls that I haven’t minded, so I am certainly not saying all girl movies are like this, but there is a disturbing trend among many of them. Brave was a story about a girl’s relationship with her mother. Men were involved but they weren’t the bad guys. While many people didn’t much care for that movie, it does show that having a strong female protagonist does not mean that feminism also has to accompany her.

When I was a kid, for every Rainbow Bright movie, there was a Transformers movie it seemed. But look at the box office numbers for Frozen. What’s the male equivalent of that? I’m not sure. Many summer blockbusters are certainly made for teenage boys, but for pre-teens, I’m not sure.

One of the biggest tragedies of this trend was Wreck-It Ralph. What a fucking bait and switch that one was! Before it came out, it looked as if Wreck-It Ralph was a movie about video games, geared towards teenage and pre-teen boys. Sonic, Bowser, Zangief, and others made appearances in the trailer. I was looking so forward to seeing it. And when it came out, what did I get? A movie about a misunderstood male villian who helps a misunderstood young female hero in a game world tailor made for young girls. Since 80% of that movie takes place in the girly cute candy world, it’s very hard for boys to relate, and even worse that they take a retro theme from many childhoods and then basically abandon it to appease girls. I honestly believe that Disney thought that they would get the young boys in to see Wreck-It Ralph and that they would tell their sisters about it, so that Disney could be assured of repeat viewings via word of mouth.

As I’ve been typing this I’m on an airplane without Internet access, I’ve been racking my brain trying to name a recent animated kids movie aimed solely at boys. I’m not coming up with one. But those aimed at girls? Many more. And of course there are plenty that are just aimed at kids in general, which is great. It’s just that on one side of the dividing line between girl and boy movies, we’ve got plenty of movies for girls. On the other side, I think we’ve got nothing, or at least very, very little for aimed squarely at boys. Nothing recent anyway.

And this trend reflects where both the money is to be made, and one area where our society neglects boys starting from a very early age. Hell, in many guy-oriented movies with a male protagonist aimed at adults, there’s usually the theme that the man is on a mission to protect/save his family/girlfriend/the world. There are countless examples. In “Wicked” the Wicked Witch of the West wants to let animals keep speaking and expose The Wizard of Oz as a fraud, and in Maleficent, Maleficent just wanted revenge against a guy who was a dick to her. There is no “greater good” being fought in these media. The “Man Goes On A Mission To Save My Family/My Country” theme appeals to men. The “I’m Going To Get Revenge On That Jerk” theme appeals to women. Yet more evidence that men are the more romantic, idealistic sex, even though we also like movies heavy on the boobies and explosions.

Not one female dies in Malificient (though one gets sick, we don’t know if she actually perishes, and if she does and I missed it, it all happened offscreen because the evil king didn’t even care about his wife). At least two males die, and both due to violence. And isn’t it weird that with both Wicked and Malificient that they’re different takes on stories where females were the villains? But then you watch these movies/plays and find out you’ve been lied to all along, and that you don’t know the whole story. The whole story being there are no evil women, no matter how evil they ever appeared in their previous movies. The evil they appeared to do was for a good reason.

One of the trailers before Malificient was merely a 3D-slipper, as in Cinderella, with the text “2015″ next to it. So there may be a Cinderella retelling and a Snow White retelling and why not? After all, these films will make the Patriarchy hundreds of millions of dollars and people will likely flock to them, because grrl power.

I’m just waiting for someone ballsy in Hollywood to make a movie about The Holocaust that shows how Hitler was really a good guy that was just misunderstood. And if they do make that movie, you can bet women will line up in droves to see it.

2014-03-23 – Julie Horvath

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Kevin believes in meritocracy because he’s white and male. The new symbol of oppression is a five-tentacled androgynous octopus on a carpet with the word “Meritocracy” on it at GitHub. Patriarchy rules  and thus Julie Horvath quits GitHub in this edition of the FOKM podcast!

Episode 36 – Jan 19 2014

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Happy 2014 everyone. On this episode, Kevin discusses home loan applications, being in control of his life, the digust a redditor’s story brought him, and how Bill Burr’s great advice on his podcast last week shouldn’t be so lauded.

This woman shaves her pubes. You can tell.
Image courtesy of Ambro / FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

Pubic Hair Trends Reveal Women’s True Nature

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I want to talk about pubic hair.

This woman shaves her pubes. You can tell. Image courtesy of Ambro / FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

This girl shaves her pubes.
Image courtesy of Ambro / FreeDigitalPhotos.net.

Female pubic hair.

And The Red Pill.

See, long ago, I was a blue piller. I actually believed what women said and gave credence to their opinion. Sometimes they said things that frustrated me. Other times they said things that hurt me.

I didn’t understand, though, how they could say one thing (“I love guys who make me laugh” or “I am looking for a good guy”) and then do something else (have sex with a guy not as funny as me, or date a guy and pay his rent too). Why are so many women so hypocritical?

Sure, I was a smart guy. Heck, I had even graduated college with honors distinction. And I was building a successful career.

But still I could not figure out why women would act this way.

These women were not dumb. They weren’t as smart as I was but they weren’t dumb either. It would be a few years before I would have The Red Pill involuntarily taken (I’m convinced I took The Red Pill rectally) and the closest I had ever heard about why you should never listen to a woman’s dating advice was, “Would a wolf ask for hunting advice from a deer?”

I never quite liked that. Because unlike deer, women want to be hunted. Other than that difference, though, that rhetorical question made sense.

So much of seduction and building attraction focuses on outcome independence. Really learning outcome independence takes practice, and I hope that you can keep this article in mind the next time you hit the town looking for some fun. Here’s the fast track to outcome independence.

You can’t take what women say seriously. And their pubic hair proves it.

If you’re older than say, 33, as of 2013, you’ll know that what I’m about to write is true. Younger than 33, and you may not believe me.

When I graduated high school in the mid-90s, girls and women had pubic hair. The only females who shaved their pubes were in porn.

Let that sink in, young-ins. Only pornstars shaved their pubes.

By around 2003, less than 10 years after I graduated high school, this had all changed. Most women and girls did not have pubic hair.

Playboy was late to the game. Their first shaved centerfold was 2001! By then, 99% of women had made the change.

What happened?

The Internet happened. The Internet brought porn to the masses in a way that it had never been delivered before. I told my parents that I wanted a computer so I could do things like book plane tickets online and do homework, but in reality I wanted to download nonstop porn. And boy, did I.

Towards the latter half of the 90s, I heard many women say the following to me and other men. And please read the below in the bitchiest inner voice you can muster:

I can’t believe you want me to shave. What are you, some creepy pedophile? You’re fucking disgusting. What, you want to fuck some 12-year-old? That’s it, isn’t it? You like 12-year-old hairless girls you fucking creepy perverted bastard!

Men under 30, you must believe me when I tell you that this is true. Only men who were creeps and pedophiles would want a woman to be shaved.

Men over 30, notice how those old jokes women used to make about a man not being able to find the clitoris have all disappeared?

I want to repeat I heard the above quote multiple times from multiple women, and I heard stories from other guys that said exactly the same thing.

What is a worse thing to call a man in modern society than a pedophile? Really think about that. If you were to call a man a pedophile, would you have some feelings behind that accusation? Could you ever change your mind about what constituted pedophile-like behavior?

Women did. (Insert your own joke about women constantly changing their minds.)

As we are about to enter 2014 the majority of women under 50 are shaved. Girls are expected to start shaving their oh-so-new-and-forbidden pubes as soon as they start growing in. Don’t shave, well, there’s a stigma. Men won’t want to fuck you, and other girls will think you’re gross.

Today’s teenage girls don’t even think about “to shave or not to shave.” They know what men (and women) expect.

This has everything to do with outcome independence and building inner game.

Once you realize that you can discard women’s opinions, especially in the area of sexual matters, can you possibly be hurt or frustrated by the difference between what they say and what (or who) they do?

THEY SAID GUYS WHO WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH SHAVED PUSSIES WERE CREEPS AND PEDOPHILES!

THESE SAME WOMEN NOW SHAVE THEIR PUSSIES REGULARLY WITHOUT THOUGHT.

AND IT HAPPENED WITHIN 5 YEARS. AND IT HAS BEEN THIS WAY FOR OVER A DECADE.

As a counter to this, do you think that within 15 years, any form of pedophilia will be accepted and even expected by most of society?

So, young grasshopper, the next time a woman says she’ll only date a guy who is tall, or she doesn’t like hairy guys, or that she’ll never have sex with a guy who is overweight, or that she’ll never play videogames, or that she doesn’t give head; Know that while she may actually believe what she’s saying, you know differently because she shaves her pussy, and she wouldn’t if we were in 1984.

If your mind isn’t blown away by now, then think about this:

Who started telling women to shave first?

Alphas.

Why did women start shaving their vagges?

Because alphas expected it.

Alphas made their expectations known, and women everywhere complied.

So what’s stopping you from making your expectations known? And what will happen when you finally realize that women will do anything you want if you make them feel good?

You’ll get lots of pussy, that’s what.

Until next time, you’re welcome.

Episode 34 – DC Talk

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In Episode 34 Kevin talks about Washington, DC and why it’s not a good place to live.

Kevin also explains how Katy Perry’s Part of Me validates a core game concept. Which one? You’ll have to listen to find out!

Saving Sarah Silverman

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Sarah Silverman recently participated in the Comedy Central Roast of James Franco. I watched the roast and loffed and LOLed throughout most of it. And I don’t even like James Franco all that much.

In order to participate in a roast, you have to have a very thick skin. It’s not only the honoree that gets roasted but anyone on the dais is fair game. Sarah Silverman was on the dais that night, and jokes were made about the fact that Sarah is no spring chicken. Here are some of the lines from Jonah Hill:

Sarah Sliverman…everyone’s like ‘she’s hot for a comic’, but I don’t agree. Everyone’s like ‘she’s hot for a comic’ but I’m like ‘she’s hot for her age.’

Seriously Sarah you were my favorite comic as a kid.

Sarah is a role model for every little girl out there. Seriously every little girl dreams of being a 58-year-old single standup comedian with no romantic prospects on the horizon. They all dream of it, but Sarah did it.

So Sarah goes on some show to talk about what it was like being the target of those jokes and well, here’s the video as well as a transcript of the relevant portion:

Me being old, first of all, at the roast? — completely took me by surprise … Because it’s personal, that is just so woman-based. I wasn’t even the oldest one on that dais. … I feel like it’s a part of, as soon as a woman gets to an age where she has opinions and she’s vital and she’s strong, she’s systematically shamed into hiding under a rock. And this is by progressive pop-culture people! You know what I mean? It’s really odd! I feel bad that it cut me. Because I should be like this about it (brushing her hand off her shoulder). I feel like your joke is that I’m still alive. My crime is not dying.

I’m glad that Sarah said that she felt like a hypocrite and that she would fight to the death for someone’s right to make fun of the fact that she’ll be in Depends adult diapers in a few years. But the rest of what she said makes me sad and it’s my sincere hope that Silverman reads this, considers the points made, and sucks my cock (sans dentures, my requirement) because I’m a goddamned genius.

Sarah is known for making audiences very uncomfortable with her extremely racist one-liners. It’s one reason I’ve liked her humor for so long. Yes, I went to go see Jesus Is Magic in the movie theater and even brought a friend (you’re welcome Sarah). My friend did not like the movie. He’s Jewish and he thought Holocaust jokes were over the line.

Sarah, being a white woman who was young and attractive at the time, would say horrifying yet funny things and the audience wouldn’t know how to react. I am a sucker for this kind of humor. I’ve seen Sarah numerous times in Los Angeles and one negative about seeing her there is that her fans come out or people are happy to see a celebrity and so that tension is not there. Kind of sucks for me.

Sarah’s jokes wouldn’t work as much coming from a white man. But her jokes worked (if you found them funny, and I did) partly because of her looks. And those looks, tall, white, not-too-Jewish, and female, helped her standup act immensely.

So about that roast. Sarah said she didn’t expect to be the target of jokes about her age. And the first thing she says is, “You’re making fun of me for still being alive.” Well, yes. But didn’t you make similar jokes about Bea Arthur (more specifically, her big floppity sloppy bushy wiry gray vagina”)? Or what about this video from Jesus is Magic where you sing “You’re going to die soon” to old people.

Sarah then goes on to say that maybe they focused on her age because they are “threatened by a woman with opinions.” Sarah, you’ve got to stop surrounding yourself with people who worship you and thus won’t give you a grip on reality. Lots of women have opinions on everything from what nail polish they prefer to who their favorite character in True Blood is. Some of the smarter ones even have opinions about political issues, as you seem to. So obviously the James Franco Roast was a major conspiracy by the Hollywood establishment to stop you from having your pro-woman opinions, and you bravely called those chauvinistic bastards out on it!

And you would know, wouldn’t you? You’re a comedian, and thus when you write your jokes in your notebook, like the one you wrote that went like this:

I always think I should get on it if I want to have kids. Because once you hit thirty it can be difficult to conceive — it can be dangerous. The best time to conceive is when you’re a black teenager.

…it wasn’t because the joke was funny or shocking, no, it was because you were threatened by black teenagers with strong opinions! (Me, I’m just threatened by black teenagers.) So no wonder you must think that the reason you were the butt of so many age jokes has less to do with your age and how your sexual market value diminishes as each second passes, but instead it has to be because you are more outspoken now than ever. Of course that’s it.

You then gave the host of the show a t-shirt that said “FEMINIST” he could wear, stating that you didn’t like the language of “us and them” and that you wanted to be all inclusive. No more dividing language.

Sarah, if that were true, why wouldn’t you have done a Demetri Martin and given him a shirt that said, “Person”?

It seems as if the statement you were making is that there shouldn’t be “us and them” language, but then you implied feminists were good, perhaps even better than other people, and those who disagree with that view are somehow wrong, but let’s not be divisive. Because who could possibly disagree with feminists on anything? Only an asshole like me would disagree with feminists, right?

Seems to me that no one is threatened by your outspoken opinions, but rather by the lack of thought and logic you have given to your opinions paired with the huge amount of people who are exposed to your opinions. Even in your current attempts at comedy, such as this Black NRA, a PSA-style video you did:

The above video makes the case that the National Rifle Association supports guns rights of everyone, and that should include black people, and thus, the Black NRA is born.

Our fund will put guns in the hands of those who need them most — young black men.

The reason the above video isn’t funny is because a comedy like this needs to be based on a grain of truth and well, statistics show that young black men have *plenty* of guns, Sarah. See this article:

According to stats from the Philadelphia Police Department, 75 percent of 324 victims killed last year were African American men, while 80 percent of those doing the killing were – you guessed it – black males.

And this article echoes that statement:

In Chicago alone, more than 270 children have been killed since 2007. And most of them were killed by other blacks, as are most of the nation’s homicide victims.

I am too lazy to look up the exact percentage, but my guess is that “most” means “more than 90 percent”. In fact, can you imagine the outrage if most black children in Chicago were killed by whites? Maybe you need to make a BCNRA (Black Child National Rifle Association) video.

So why let the fact that plenty of black men already have guns stop you from making a video about how blacks need guns? A video that is of course hosted by a white woman (as if blacks need whites to speak on their behalf).

But there’s no “us and them” right? In your world, there’s no way that Zimmerman could have believed he was about to die with his head being slammed into the concrete by someone he’s never even met before.

I’m even disappointed that instead of the Black NRA, you didn’t call it the NNRA! You’re losing your edge homegirl! You’ve used the word “nigger” before…

…so why stop now?

Sarah, I’m asking you to stop this awful spiral you’re in and start having an open mind. It’ll likely make you funnier and might broaden your appeal.

I saw you lots of times when I lived in LA and in this age where comedians like Louis CK, Jim Norton, Joe Rogan and more are writing new hours almost every year, you were still doing most of the same material in 2012 that I had seen in 2009. If any joke from the Franco Roast should have hurt your feelings, I would have guessed it would be this one, from Aziz Ansari:

Sarah Silverman is here. Some of the guys here tonight are really taking me to task over one Kanye West joke I did in my act five years ago. If anyone wants to make fun of any jokes Sarah did five years ago please don’t; she’s still doing those jokes.

Please don’t hate me Sarah. I’m just a fan who wants you to find your edge and humor again. This all comes from a place of love, and I’ll unzip my fly for you anytime.

Episode 33 – Twitter Wars

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Kevin defended Pax Dickinson (@paxdickinson) on Twitter and found himself the target of a Twitter war because of it.  This incident reaffirmed Kevin’s current belief that the US Government should force all citizens to serve a couple of years in the armed forces. And Kevin also no longer looks like John Candy.

Cheap Laughs – Get Some Patrice O’Neal Now

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As a video gamer, I’ve known about the Humble Bundle for years. These guys get together with independent game developers and release games on a “pay-what-you-want” model. They’ve recently ventured out into books and music, but last week they launched the Humble Comedy Bundle.

Currently, grabbing the Humble Bundle will get you the following:

  • Maria Bamford – The Special Special Special
  • Tig Notaro – Live
  • Hannibal Burress – My Name is Hannibal
  • Jim Norton – Please Be Offended

If you beat the average purchase price (currently about $8.75), you also get:

  • Louis CK – Live At The Beacon
  • Patrice O’Neal – Uncensored
  • Patrice O’Neal – Mr. P
  • Todd Glass – Todd Glass Talks About Stuff
  • Gary Gulman – In This Economy
  • I Am Comic – Stand-up Comedy Documentary by Jordan Brady

I purchased this bundle instantly. For the price alone, any one of these items is worth it. I’ve also met quite a few of the people above and all of them have been great to me.

But this isn’t about me — it’s about why you should purchase this bundle. And that reason is: Patrice O’Neal.

Mr. P is the only comedy album I’ve ever heard that accurately captures the energy of a comedy club. That energy, the anything-can-happen vibe, is a very hard thing to get captured, and Mr. P accurately documents it.

Patrice O’Neal died a few years ago. I heard his name but really started to know him when I started listening to the Opie And Anthony radio show on SiriusXM back in 2008. Patrice could take over the show and always had a fresh, unexpected take on things.

But he excelled in relationships and in how men and women interact. What guys want. How men should treat women. Since he died and the manosphere has taken off a bit, he’s become known as a “Red Pill” comedian. And he is. But he’s so much more.

Roosh has written recently about the lack of direction of the manosphere. He believes Mark Minter getting married is a sign of that. How women speak for the manosphere is bad and how he doesn’t want to hear a woman’s opinion on things, no matter what.

That’s his right and I respect him, but while lots of you know about Patrice O’Neal, did you know that he was also in a long-term relationship with a single mom?

The fact that Minter is a hypocrite does not negate his views on marriage. The fact that O’Neal was in an LTR with a single mother does not mean his observations are not spot on and hilarious at the same time.

Patrice O’Neal was not a “red pill” comic. He was a comedian period, just like the rest of the above group. He had a viewpoint and was unapologetic for it. Plus he was fucking hilarious. By pigeon-holing him into a specific category we are also limiting his potential reach.

That being said, my demographic certainly would enjoy Patrice’s humor and I think the world is a slightly sadder place without him. I’m very pissed at O’Neal for not releasing more albums and specials. You can also check out Elephant In The Room to see him work his magic, and beyond that, there’s not much video of him that I’m aware of.

You can currently purchase the Humble Comedy Bundle here for the next 6 days. Do it immediately.